MilkBank Blog
Packing That Bag
It’s about that time when we should start thinking about the fact that this baby will be joining us in the not too distant future. Four women we know have recently gone into labour early, awakening us to the truth that we have no control over any of this and all we can really do is be prepared.
So I’m starting to gather together the things we need to take to the hospital with us. Having absolutely NO idea where to start I’m very grateful for the incredible resource all parents to be are given in BC a book entitled Baby’s Best Chance which covers all aspects of pregnancy, labour and baby care.
Here are their suggestions for what to pack.
Labour Kit
- Baby’s Best Chance (or book of your choice on baby care)
- Birth plan (if you’re using one)
- Lip balm or lip gloss
- Massage oil or talcum powder
- Snacks and drinks for you and your support team
- Swim suit for your partner (so they can get into the shower with you - as our prenatal class instructor said nurses much prefer that the partners wear clothes!)
- Camera (and film if you use it) plus batteries and chargers
- Music and music player
- A picture, a design, a figure or anything you find pleasant to look at
- A list of friends’ and family’s phone numbers
- Dental care products
- Hair care products
- Skin care products
- Other personal items
- Cell phones or coins for pay phones
Personal items
- Washable robe (front opening for breastfeeding)
- Two or three nightgowns or pairs of pyjamas (front opening for breastfeeding)
- Nursing bra and pads
- At least three pairs of underwear (larger styles - not bikini or g-string)
- Socks
- Large sanitary pads
- Clothes to wear home from the hospital (loose fitting)
- Flip flops
For the Baby
- Car seat
- Undershirt and sleepers
- Diapers (newborn size) and baby wipes
- Sweater, hat and booties
- Shawl or blanket
- Soft carrier or sling
These seem like a great starting point for the bag but I also have a nagging suspicion that there must be other things that new parents found either incredibly helpful or a waste of time. What would you add or remove to the above list?
Keep Your Cool
Where I live summer last approximately twenty minutes. Okay, I’m exaggerting. It’s more like forty minutes. Well, that’s what it feels like anyway. We go from summer to a very mild spring and then WHAMO it’s summer and it’s ninety degrees in the shade.
People think we are crazy but we live in an old house that does not support air-conditioning. It would, technically, but not without us completely re-configuring the heating system of the house and let me tell you that is just not an option right now. We live very close to a very big lake, and because of that we get some relief; Temperatures are usually 10-15 degrees cooler where I live than the rest of the city. Still, once we have a few days of straight heat with high humidity and no breaks, my house is like a hot box.
I don’t know how you do it, people like to say to me. Frankly, I don’t know how either, I just do it.
Me, I can handle sweating while sitting perfectly still but it’s my little ones that I worry about. Babies and toddlers are particularly prone to dehydration since they don’t always recognize when it’s time to slow down. Here are some tips I keep in mind for my great, hot-but-way-too-short-summer-having state:
The American Academy of Pediatrics does not recommend sunscreen for babies younger than six months. He’s old enough for it now, but even still if we go outside I make sure the baby is shaded either by the stroller cover and/or a wide brimmed hat.
Make sure an offer enough fluids. Add an extra feeding or bottle of formula if you’ve had a busy day or have been out in the heat. (Make sure you breastfeeding mama’s are drinking enough water too!)
Draw your shades during the prime sun hours to help keep the house cooled down as much as possible. Open as many windows as you can during the night.
For your older kids, break out the Popsicles. Offer cold drinks and light snacks throughout the day. Cold grapes or watermelon are usually a hit. Set up the sprinkler or the water table.
If all else fails, a trip to the mall to purchase an oscillating fan can always cool everyone down and provide a much needed break.
What are your summer time tricks to keep the mercury from rising?
Moms and Facebook
I recently logged back on to Facebook. I was a member briefly last year but halted it as I didn’t like the old application.
Facebook is good for keeping in touch with old friends as I have been doing that in the past week. I noticed old friends sharing pregnancy photos and many of their children. Many moms have their kids photos as their profile picture. I’m guilty of that too with social applications. However, I don’t go overboard on it.
Right now on Facebook I only have a couple of photos up of the kids and don’t really plan to put too much information on there. Like blogging, I feel a little paranoid about featuring my kids. After all, the Internet is so open.
Perhaps other moms want to put their kids up on the profile photos because they look cuter than themselves?
I wonder if when my son and daughter grow up, they will be upset that I put some of their baby photos online. If the Internet existed and my parents did, I personally wouldn’t be. However, everyone has an opinion on this and some may say it’s exploitation. I remember watching The Today Show a few months ago with the topic being mommy bloggers. A very well known blogger was on the show being interviewed about her blog, in which she makes thousands of ad dollars from. Instead of expecting nice, general questions about blogging, Kathie Lee Gifford went on to insinuate that it might be a little exploitive to have her daughter’s pictures published regularly and wasn’t it going to bite the blogger back when she’s an adult?
Isn’t the same as with Jon & Kate’s kids? Sure, they are a reality show but these kids are all very young and have no ruling over the matter. The same I ask about blogging. Doesn’t the same go for the popular blogger making money off her kid? What I just wrote could be controversial but that is my opinion.
What about you? How do you feel about children’s photos on Facebook and on blogs?
(Photo: MSNBC)
My Organic Baby
I’ve been receiving more eco-friendly and organic baby products this time around with my daughter than when my son was a baby.
Do I think eco-friendly items are better? Some products that are “green” do stand out. For example, organic clothes. There’s a difference in softness to the material. I rather have my daughter wear a more expensive organic onesie than a cheaper one made out of half cotton and polyester.
I now use household cleaners that are kid-friendly too. I’ve switched over to using green hand sanitizing sprays and organic sunscreen. At least with the organic sunscreen the baby can be protected with lotion.
An item I do not see much of a difference in is baby plates and utensils made out of corn. It seems to be all the rage. Buy this plate, it’s made of corn! The baby got to sleep in a luxury bassinet in her first four months. It is beautiful, being made of sustainable New Zealand wood. However, would I have noticed that it was an eco-friendly product? No. However, it’s something of quality and I will keep it for years to come.
As for making homemade baby food, I’ve been buying some organic fruits and vegetables but not often. It’s still very pricey and the choice between an avocado that’s $3 versus one that is $1 is easy for me.
The only store bought I have been buying is HappyBaby food. They sell frozen organic baby food in cubes. I always buy this one combination that tastes great and the baby eats it all up. It’s made of spinach, mango, pear, and rice. I am in no way getting paid by this company to rave about their product. I just think it’s the best I’ve tried so far.
I’m glad my kids are getting more healthier products in their lives than when I was a child. I can’t believe I used to wear polyester outfits as a child!
Running on Empty
My family had a crazy weekend away. We arrived back in town on Sunday afternoon, which should have given me plenty of time to prepare for Monday morning, right? Wrong.
Having children means that to accomplish what you used to do in a couple of hours, now requires list-making and easily three times as many hours.
Between the laundry, the quick trip to the grocery store, the making of dinner, the breaking up of fights over matchbox cars, the breaks to wipe bottoms and clean up spills, I managed to get it all done. I was completely exhausted and didn’t have five minutes to myself all night, but I was able to get everyone out of the house the next day.
Everyone has their own shortcuts that they put in place to make the work that goes along with parenting run a little more smoothly and hopefully a whole lot more quickly. These are some of mine:
1. Make a pot of soup every Sunday. Soup is easy, fast, good for you and one pot goes a long way. I’m not talking gourmet lobster bisque here, I’m talking about minestrone with italian sausage. Serve up when in need of a quick dinner along side a grilled cheese sandwich and everyone will be happy.
2. Combine trips. I know this sounds obvious, but it really requires some thought. If you are running an errand or have a doctor appointment, think about what else is around so you can save a trip later.
3. Use your lunch/child break wisely. I work outside the home but at least once a week instead of going out and ordering lunch or simply staring into space like I’d like to, I run through the grocery store to pick up miscellaneous items I need and store them in the work refridgerator until the end of the day. This saves me from having to stop after work when the lines are longer and I get to go directly home, which is AWESOME.
What are your favorite time saving tips? I’d love to hear them. Share them in the comments.
Babymoon Tips
As I mentioned previously we ended up deciding to take a wee babymoon and headed to Portland, Oregon for 3 days.
We had a fantastic time and it was a fabulous opportunity for the two of us to really connect and discuss our impending parenthood.
Now that we’re back and refreshed I thought I’d share a few tips to take into consideration when planning your own break.
Consider when you want to go.
I am 33 weeks and to be honest I wouldn’t want to go much later than that. As it happened the baby moved down earlier in the week so at times walking was uncomfortable. Also don’t plan to go too early or you’ll be able to undo all of your relaxation. 30 - 36 weeks would be best depending on how your body is adapting.
Be aware of your capabilities.
We usually try to see as much as possible when we head to a new city but when into this trip knowing that rushing around was probably not the best idea. We basically had one thing each day we wanted to achieve which gave us a focus and a sense of achievement without feeling overwhelmed or tired.
Pick a Preggo Friendly Location.
We chose a hotel that was central to our “must see” list but also to public transport. In fact one of the reasons we chose Portland is that we had heard it was a very easy place to get around (and we weren’t disappointed). You are probably not going to be wanting to be taking long journeys crammed in with loads of people or having to walk for hours to get from A to B. Also check on taxi regulations - some cities allow taxies to “troll” for customers by driving around, others only have specific points or places where you can get a cab.
Carry Supplies.
One of the best parts of travelling is having an outing evolve from one event into an adventure but often this means not necessarily being on schedule. Carrying water and a couple of easy snacks in your bag can make the difference between having a fabulous adventure or a gruelling epic disaster.
Relax.
Remember this trip is for you to get some very much-deserved R&R. It’s not easy growing a human and away from the distractions of everyday life take the time to relax. If this means naps everyday at 3 or sleeping to 11 or even booking that long massage then do it. Your body (and your sanity) will thank you.
Not-So Happy Fathers Day
I have to admit, our Fathers Day was kind of a bust.
My family was out of town, staying with relatives. If we had been at home, I would have prepped my oldest before bed, explaining that it was a special day. I would have given him instructions to go straight to his dad’s side of the bed as soon as he bolted out of bed and said the magical words “Happy Fathers Day” which, as far as I am concerned, are a much better gift than any crappy metallic-footed grill light someone may have gotten dad this year.
Who does that? Oh yeah. I did.
But since we were away, I couldn’t and I didn’t. Tired and out of sorts, my boy wanted nothing to do with it. I did remember to get a card, but the boy refused to sign it. I did bring a present but had nothing to wrap it in. My son wouldn’t say “Happy Fathers Day” or anything like it. In fact, he decided to up the ante and announce to me and his father that he loved me, but not him.
“I love you mom” he said sweetly “but not dad. I only love you.”
Ouch. Happy Fathers Day indeed.
After we wrestled that one into bed for the evening, I turned to my husband and said “You know he doesn’t mean it”, but he didn’t look convinced.
So I turned to Dr Greene. According to his website, “Many children strongly prefer one parent over every other person in the world for a brief period of time.” If it says it on the Internet, it must be true.
This morning, which are usually not my son’s best moments of the day, my husband leaned in to give him a kiss. He reciprocated without all of the smart talk from the day before. They wished each other a good day, gave hugs and exchanged I love you’s.
I exhaled a sigh of relief. Thank you, Internet, for being right this time.
Baby Tantrums Have Made Me Lose Weight
The baby has been developing in leaps and bounds this week. The other day she said the syllable “Ma”. I know it was a fluke and she was just babbling. She also has been having more baby tantrums. Sometimes she cries because she needs a diaper change. Other times she just wants a cuddle. She really is becoming quite the communicator.
According to a story about baby tantrums on babiestoday.com, discovering the reason for the crying is the first course of action.
“First and foremost, when their baby cries, parents should make sure their physical needs are met and that the baby is not in physical distress,” a doctor in the article says. “So make sure the diaper is clean, the baby is not hungry and the baby is not hurt in any way. Once physical safety is ensured, parents should comfort and soothe their baby by holding them, rocking them back and forth, humming a lullaby, etc.”
The only thing not mentioned in the above statement is when the baby cries when I am ready to eat dinner. She never misses a beat. She’ll be happily playing on the floor right before the plate is placed in front of me. The smell of food gives her the cue and she’ll start crying, wanting to be held. This is when I usually gobble down my food. If my husband is around, then we’ll take turns eating. I really miss eating a meal in peace. The upside is at least I lost all my post-baby weight!
However, she really is a very good baby. She never cries, except for the crazy tantrums. If you take an object away from her. Whoa boy, look out! She clenches her fists, squeezes her eyes shut and screams the house down. WIll this determine what her personality will be like when she grows older? I don’t think so. This is normal behavior and at least I know she can communicate by showing me she’s in distress or unhappy.
Does your baby have tantrums often? How do you deal with them?
Labors of Love
One of our closest friends had the most beautiful little girl last Monday afternoon. We rushed to the hospital to sneak in before visiting hours were over and I was lucky enough to get to hold her when she was just four hours old. As I stood there basking in all her little glory, my friend looked at me over her hospital bed and said “So Em, you’re next!” It actually took me a couple of minutes to realize what she meant and then the full reality of having to get my equivalent of her baby out of my body hit me hard.
I’ve done my best to avoid thinking about labor and delivery until now. I knew we’d cover it in our prenatal classes so I guess I was waiting to be presented with the information rather than seeking it out. My only early brush with labour was when the midwife misguidedly gave me a copy of Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth. I’ve tried but I really can’t put into words the traumatizing effect this book had on me. I don’t think I have ever been so terrified by the written word in my life.
So at this week’s midwife appointment I ‘fessed up that I was struggling with the whole idea of labor and birth. As Husbando put it, I am the Queen of Anecdotal Evidence and a lot of my friends had difficult or long births with their first children. The midwife suggested that I seek out more positive birth stories and as we looked through the books in their library she handed me Labor Day: Shared Experiences from the Delivery Room. Now obviously I was a little gun-shy after the Ina May fear-fest but as I desperately don’t want to let my fear get the better of me I decided to give it a try.
Well I love the book! Its a collection of 35 birth stories by very different women from Canada, the US and Europe all with different attitudes and approaches to labour. A couple of the stories are written by fathers which provides a really different insight into the whole process and I’ll be passing those ones along to Husbando. None of the stories have scared me and I love how honest these women are about how they felt and what they experienced. Although the book hasn’t cured my fear entirely it has definitely made me feel more capable in my ability to cope with whatever labor throws at me and if you are looking for a little encouragement or inspiration as you make your own way towards birth I highly recommend it!
Dealing With Separation Anxiety
My little baby daughter has been experiencing Separation Anxiety. Just two days ago my husband’s friend was over for a short visit when he thrusted our 8-month-old into his arms. His friend is only 23-years-old and seemed inexperienced with holding babies. My daughter wailed so loud!
It was the first time she looked upset at a stranger holding her. Perhaps she sensed his nervousness? Then today at a work-related picnic, my husband thrust the baby again into this woman’s arms. My daughter cried out loud again, tears streaming down her face. This woman is in her 40’s and never had children. Twenty minutes later, another victim got to hold my daughter. My husband was really into playing “pass the baby” at this picnic! The baby was fine for a second, then realized the man cuddling her wasn’t daddy. This man is in his 50’s and has three older children.
It’s really funny how her reaction to strangers has just changed so suddenly. My son was never shy like this. He would let anyone hold him without any problem.
In a Babycenter article about Separation Anxiety, they list three ways in helping your child deal with it.
Option I
Minimize separations as much as possible and take your baby along if he seems to feel anxious. With this option, you’re basically waiting for your baby to outgrow this stage.
Option II
If you have to leave your baby — for example, to return to work — try leaving him with people who are familiar, like his father, grandmother, or aunt. Your baby may still protest, but he might adjust more easily to your absence when surrounded by well-known faces.
Option III
If you need to leave your child with someone he doesn’t know, give him a chance to get to know his caregiver while you’re still around.
Right now I am at Option I, letting her outgrow this stage. If she is like my son, who is a social butterfly, she’ll be fine in a few more months.
Does your child get anxious when separated from you?
(photo: yourfamily.org.uk)
