MilkBank Blog
Things that Go Bump In the Night
Wow. Things change so quickly. When my son was born in 2005 no one was talking about crib safety or bumper pads. It was assumed that you would have a bumper pad, along with the corresponding crib sheet, quilt and matching, laminated, wall stencils, of course.
I am sooo not crafty, so my nursery doesn’t scream of a nursery like you would picture in a fancy magazine and I did forgo the stenciled appliques, but I did go with the full crib set which included, at that time, a crib bumper pad. It did look nice in his room, but the best part about it was that he loved to sleep next to it. No matter where I layed him down to sleep, I would always find him with his sweet, sweaty, baby head pressed up against that bumper pad.
It wasn’t until right before my youngest was born that I learned that the safety of using a bumper pad was being called into question. According to this link at About.com regarding bumper pads:
“Some major children’s safety organizations have recently suggested that parents and child care providers should remove crib bumper pads from baby cribs. The groups include: American Academy of Pediatrics, Health Canada, National Center for Health and Safety in Child Care, the Consumer Product Safety Commission and the First Candle/National SIDS Alliance. Some state and regional Back to Sleep campaigns now recommend removing bumper pads, as well. “
Based on my own experience, I decided to use the crib bumper pad for my younger son as well. Until it fell apart. Unfortunately, it wasn’t meant for two and the strings which tied it to the crib started to tear off. Now that, to me, didn’t seem safe, so I removed it.
Fearing he wouldn’t sleep as well, I called some girlfriends to see who had one they weren’t using and got my hands on one. For a week or two he went without and while I don’t think his quality of sleep suffered, I did find him more than once with his little foot sticking out from the crib slats. He wasn’t, stuck, it wasn’t dangerous, but it woke him up and that’s no good. So a replacement bumper pad has been added.
What about you? Do you use one? Are you concerned about safety? Does you baby notice the difference? Tell your story in the comments!
Onward to Organic Milk
After taking my baby, wait. I should stop saying that. He really is not a baby anymore.
I took my toddler *cringe* in to the doctor this week for what I suspected was ANOTHER ear infection. The good news: It wasn’t. The bad news: It wasn’t. Oh well, while I was there, I asked the nurse- Hey. Do you have any formula samples laying around? I’ve got three weeks till his birthday and I hate to have to buy another giganto can.
Because you know you can do that right? During one of my first visits to this pediatrician’s office the nurse told me as she scurried out the door that they always have samples so I should always ask. So I do. Even before I started supplementing I would bring home a mini-can from each visit and stack them lovingly in the cabinet. I’ve used them all and barely paid out anything out of pocket for formula. Yes, I’ve shelled out a boatload of cash in co-pays, way more than I’ve saved in formula, but it makes me feel like I got something out of the deal. You know, besides a healthy kid.
The doctor came into the room and apologied, apparently the formula goody closet was empty. She looked at the chart, realized his birthday was weeks away and told me not to bother. She gave me the all clear to go ahead and switch him to whole milk. YAY!
I stopped on the way home and bought the big, gallon size jug or organic milk. I’m not sure it makes a huge difference in the end because I am not wealthy enough or dedicated enough to make sure that everything that touches my kids plates is organic, but I feel pretty strongly about milk if for no other reason than the quantity of how much they drink and the studies on the growth hormones and antibiotics in non-organic milk.
I balked a little when I saw the price of the gallon. (Almost $7.00!) but it’s a fraction in what I would pay for formula and holy cow, organic whole milk tastes GOOD.
I started adding an ounce at a time to his bottles and he hasn’t protested so on we go.
One more milestone to cross off the list. Organic milk it is.
At Least I Know What’s In My Breast Milk
My daughter is now 8-months-old and I’m still breastfeeding her. I give her four feeds a day now. I’m sure she’s gained weight since her last check-up. Her thighs look so chunky and edible!
As a nursing mother, I only rely on my own. This means, my baby is only drinking my milk and no one elses. I’m reminded of the scene in The Hand That Rocks The Cradle where the nanny starts breastfeeding the couple’s baby because she’s still mourning the loss of her own. Haven’t seen it? Rent it!
I don’t even drink alcohol because I get paranoid. The only thing I have been at ease about is caffeine. I drink two cups of coffee a day which doesn’t affect the baby at all. In the evenings sometimes I drink decaffeinated black tea.
Last night I was so tired I drank a can of Coke and had a cup of coffee. The baby went to sleep as usual but I lied awake in bed for two hours!
If I couldn’t breastfeed, I personally would never buy breast milk from another woman.
Momlogic.com reports that the Australian Breast Feeding Association says the new trend now is for donors to advertise their liquid gold on black markets. One woman was selling hers for $2 an ounce on Craigslist. Crazy to think she thought she could make extra money. Curious to know if anyone bought from her. However, there are risks to buying from unknown sources. HIV and hepatitis can be passed through breast milk.
Donating breast milk is popular with reputable companies. One national milkbank, milkinmamas.com, has accepted so many donations they are not accepting any at this time.
Wondering if you couldn’t breastfeed, would you buy from a milkbank? If so, how do you know the mother didn’t drink a gallon of coffee a day?
Babymoons
With only 60 days to go until I am due (where exactly has the time gone btw?) I’m starting to feel the nervousness and excitement of such a massive impending life change building. In basically no time at all our lives as we currently know them will be forever changed. And that’s amazing. And terrifying and well, just so mind boggling.
I am completely ready for the first few months to be a sleepless blur of Husbando and my needs coming secondary to the little creature growing inside me. But before that happens I feel as if we need to do something to mark, protect and celebrate our relationship before we’re put under pressure.
Enter the Babymoon.
A Babymoon is a vacation or getaway taken by an expecting couple as a sort of ‘last hurrah’ before the baby is born. (The phrased was coined by renowned author/activist Sheila Kitzinger in her 1996 book The Year After Childbirth.) I’ve never really considered taking a week or two to escape before the baby’s due (there’s still so much to get done!) and I’m not sure I could really enjoy a tropical vacation at this point so we’re thinking of taking a ‘city break’ and escaping for a long weekend.
To me the perfect long weekend away would involve a sumptuous hotel, exploring a new city, a couple of galleries or museums, some fabulous food and maybe some live music (live jazz would be perfect). All of the sorts of things we used to do when we were first courting each other. I want a chance to reconnect and strengthen our feelings for each other before the reality of sleepless nights and not showering for three days gets in the way.
I’m thinking that Portland might be our destination of choice. We seem to have missed the boat, so to speak, on flights as the restriction on flying pregnant varies from 32 – 39 weeks depending on the airline (San Francisco was my first choice) and Portland is a reasonable drive from where we are, without being too long. Neither of us have been to Portland but have heard nothing but rave reviews from people who have. So have you been to Porland? Do you think it fits my criteria for a weekend away? What are the must see and do’s? I’ll keep you posted as to how we get on!
Showers & Sprinkles
I posted before about how excited I am about being thrown a baby shower but now I have some questions about showers and I wondered what you all think.
I’ve always thought of showers as girly occasions but now that mine is being organized I’m considering making it Jack & Jill. I know Husbando is not overly fussed about oohing and ahhing over teeny tiny items of clothing but I’m wondering what to do about my close male friends. I spent most of my 20′s hanging with boys, in fact I had just as many ‘bridesmen’ at my wedding as I did bridesmaids. These are guys who have definitely had a hand in who I am as a person and I treasure our friendships. These days the dynamic has shifted slightly and we rarely spend as much one-on-one time together as we did but thankfully they have all married well and I adore their wives – so when we do get together I hang with the wives and Husbando hangs with my guys. So how do I handle the situation with them? I would hate to exclude them because they are so important to me but I also don’t want to make them uncomfortable if the topic turns to vajayjays!
My thinking now is if we do Jack & Jill then we’ll all be able to spend some time together but that the two camps will eventually split off and the girls can coo over little itty bitty clothes and the guys can all go shoot zombies on the PS3! So what do you think? Reasonable compromise? Dads – would that make you feel weird or would you be happy to be included?
And while I’m picking your collective brains – what do you think about showers for baby number two? Several of my girlfriends are now pregnant with their second children and it seems slightly weird to me to not acknowledge the new baby in some way. Traditional etiquette says second showers are a no-no but is that attitude just old fashioned? Should we sprinkle the new baby and mother to be with love and gifts instead of showering them? What do you think?
Soothing The Baby To Sleep
I just got online to type this after a couple of hours of lying next to my baby in bed. It’s basically torture when the sun goes down. I’m not kidding. I believe the problem is that she has gotten used to be nursed to sleep in our bed.
In the evening I usually put her down in her crib while she’s fast asleep. However after about a half an hour she usually wakes up and cries. Then I nurse her in bed and she stays with me and my snoring husband until the morning.
I am trying to find a way where she can sleep in her crib all night. When she was first born I used to just put her down and she would go to sleep herself. She still can do that if I catch her at the right time. For example her nap time is at noon and if she has been awake a couple of hours and looks drowsy than I will put her down and leave her in her room.
I also am worried that when I finally stop nursing her, she won’t want to let go of the breast at night. Maybe I worry too much about these sorts of things but hey, I’m sleep deprived.
A Babycenter article says this:
If your baby is used to breast- or bottle-feeding as he goes to sleep in your arms, you’ll have to break his need to suck to sleep. You can move your child’s feeding to earlier in the bedtime routine or slowly reduce the number of ounces or number of minutes of this feeding. Or when you see your baby starting to drift off during a feeding, promptly end his meal and finish the rest of the bedtime routine before laying him down.
Actually, this works because she does go to sleep after I unlatch her from my breast. It’s just getting her out of our bed that needs fixing!
As for leaving the baby in her crib to cry a little , that is a no-can-do for me since my son sleeps in the next room and there is no way we want him to wake up!
I guess I’ll just have to wait until this stage of hers is over. I will practice more of leaving her to sooth herself to sleep in the day though. A mom needs her rest!
(Photo: group weston)
Playing Favorites
Be honest. Do you have a favorite child? If you don’t have children yet, do you think your parents did?
I’ll go first. Yes and Yes.
My brother was the favorite growing up. He was the baby and the only boy and my parents were much older when he came along than when they had my sister and me. I suspect that had more than a little to do with it. I’m sure they had grown and mellowed as parents by the time he was born and being the baby, well, I think most mothers have an extra tender spot for them.
Not that I think my parents loved me or my sister any less. It was just different. Like how you can love cheesecake and macaroni and cheese equally but they are very different things. Sometimes you are just more in the mood for one than the other.
When I was getting ready to give birth the second time I agonized over how could I possibly love any other baby as much as I loved my older son. I couldn’t, I was convinced, and decided surely I couldn’t be the only mother who felt that way and by golly, I would just learn to accept that fact.
Man was I ever WRONG WRONG WRONG. The minute that second baby arrived I was swooning, head over heels. Madly in love. For a few months I think he overshadowed my older child just a little bit. I mean really, how can you not dote on an adorable new baby every minute of the day? I still loved my first born just as much, but suddenly it was easier to love the baby than the slighted and not at all happy about it three year old. It took a little more patience and resilience and thought.
I noticed recently that the balance seems to have shifted. A year later my older son is so much more engaged, level headed about things, funny and a joy to be around. He’s my favorite companion hands down and I miss him terribly when we are apart and I can’t wait for him to wake up and start the day with me.
That’s not to say I won’t go weak in the knees when the baby starts to talk and says I love you for the first time. It probably will coincide with a major attitude adjustment as my oldest prepares for kindergarten and I can already tell what that is gonna look like. I don’t think it will be pretty.
Something tells me this is a constant ebb and flow of parenting and one thing is for sure, I wouldn’t trade either of them for all the cheesecake AND mac and cheese in the world.
Teething Pain. It’s Not Just for Babies Anymore
So you and your baby are happy as can be. She’s eating well, napping fine, overall, everyone is getting fairly decent, if not great, sleep at night. Ahhh. Having a baby isn’t so difficult after all, is it?
Until one day your baby wakes up in an absolutely terrible mood. At midnight. Then again at three. Then maybe one more time at five-thirty. Your attempts to sooth her are futile. She’s tossing and turning, fussing and restless.
Morning comes. You try to feed her but she doesn’t want the bottle and she pushes the spoon of delicious apple-blueberry puree away from her again and again. She must be tired, you think, remembering the waking hours of the previous night and try to get her down for a nap. She falls asleep but for oh, about twenty minutes and the whole business starts again.
Welcome to teething.
At eleven months old my baby has his two bottom teeth and for all practical purposes, one top tooth. I say that because while it has descended as much into the gum tissue as possible without breaking through, it has decided to stay there indefinitely and boy, is he mad about it. I called the nurse line to ask if there was anything I should do to help it along and the answer was no. Even though it’s been that way for weeks, we have to let nature take it’s course.
Heavy.Sigh.
What can I do in the meantime to ease his discomfort? My doctor’s office provided the following advice:
Pain relief: Provide infant Tylenol or Motrin if he seems inconsolable. They also recommended teething gels or tablets. I’ve never tried the tablets, but my experience with the gels is that they wear off quickly and usually further agitate the irritated baby, but at this point, I’m ready to give them another go.
Cold compresses: Maybe you’ve heard these before? Frozen bagels, frozen washcloths, teething rings and cold spoons can provide temporary relief and feel good against sore gum tissues.
Love: Sometimes there is nothing to do but good old fashioned snuggle time and your best attempt at distraction. A change of scenery, a walk outside, a trip to the swings, all can give your baby (and you) a needed break from the crying.
Even in the thick of the sleepless nights and difficult days, it’s important to remember that this too, shall pass. Now if only that top tooth would pass where it’s supposed to be, everyone in my house would be a whole lot happier. What other ideas have you tried to subdue the teething monster? Leave your suggestions in the comments!
Items To Bring When Taking The Baby Out Of The House
Bringing the baby out can be really challenging. For expectant mothers out there, I have put together a list of things on what to bring with a child under age one.
1. Infant Seat – Your baby is now a week old and fresh out of the hospital. The great invention, the infant car seat, will assist you in your grocery shopping chores as you place it in the shopping cart. Hopefully, your baby will be sleeping soundly as you choose between getting the cheap diapers on sale or the more expensive Pampers brand. If you don’t have a car seat that slots into a stroller, you must get the Go Go Babyz. You just place the car seat onto the cart. It’s great for short trips to the store.
2. Teething Toys – Your baby is older now and ready to chew on anything he or she can get their hands on. This is a must. It keeps them occupied anwhere from the car to the coffee shop. Forgot to bring a toy? I have found paper cups and water bottles handy!
3. Stroller – This is a must accessory. You need to get out because sitting at home watching The View every morning is not giving you the exercise you need. That’s why you need a stroller. I recommend the Bugaboo. I think it’s a great product and lasts a long time.
4. Blanket – This is also good for babies to hold and chew on. No need to get a big blanket, a small one will do.
5. Snacks – I just started bringing this with me on outings. Finger foods are always good if you don’t have time to properly serve a meal. Get a snack that doesn’t leave a mess. I recently bought Baby Mums Mums.
6. Spare Clothes – If you’re only going out for a few hours, bring a spare pair of pants and tops. This is for when the unexpected poop explosion happens.
7. Sippy Cup – At six months I started giving the baby a sippy cup. She really just gnaws on it but it’s a start on giving her some water. Be prepared for other babies and toddlers to put the cup into their mouths.
That’s it. This is my little list. Notice how I didn’t mention a pacifier? Personally, I don’t give my baby one as I had a tough time getting it out of my son’s mouth when he was sleeping.
This post is dedicated to my friend who is pregnant with her first baby.
(photo: littlebabyguide.com)
Its Gettin’ Hot In Here!
Well apparently summer has finally descended onto our little corner of the West Coast. We literally went from 57 to 90 degrees (14 to 32 for those like me who think in Fahrenheit) in one week. Which is a wee bit too much for my body to handle so quickly.
I had originally thought it would be great to be pregnant in the summer because of all of the cute fashion options. No tights, closed toe shoes or baggy sweaters for me! Of course I hadn’t considered the reality of doubled blood volume and heat. I was prepared to feel a little sluggish but I definitely wasn’t ready for how quickly my body would shut down in the heat. A lesson I learned on Saturday night when I suddenly had to lie down because I had come over all faint.
So what’s a preggo to do? Obviously I went online for tips and discovered an article on BabyCenter Canada entitled ‘Pregnant & feeling the heat? Here’s how to cope’. It is an ok article but basically told me what I already knew – drink water, wear a hat, stay out of the sun. Then I noticed in my Google results that there was an article with the same name but for Baby Center India. Now if I think its hot here its nothing compared to India so I quickly headed over to see how the suggestions compared. The article was really interesting and had more than double the ideas on keeping cool, although some of them involved natural products we might not be able to find easily in North America.
Some of my favourite ideas include:
- Filling a spray bottle with two parts rose water (available at drug stores) and one part water and keeping it in the fridge to spritz your face and body regularly
- Placing chilled cucumber slices on your eyes
- Putting rose petals or jasmine flowers in a bowl of water next to a fan or air conditioner (mmmm heavenly cool scents!)
- Avoid clothes made of polyester, blended and synthetic fabrics
Great tips that are as useful in the North American sun as they are under the scorching Indian sun and I’m really looking forward to trying them. Do you have any other tips for keeping cool?
